Understanding the Power of Your Communication
Watching a child struggle with an anxiety disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder or related challenges often leaves parents and loved ones feeling powerless. Despite our best efforts to calm, reassure, and protect, actions like telling kids “it will be okay” or “you don’t need to worry” might not provide the long-term relief we aim for. At the Center for Anxiety, OCD, and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in Philadelphia, we understand the crucial role families can play in the healing process.
Drawing on cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), and especially the SPACE program, here we will focus on supportive statements, a simple yet profound tool for providing support and encouragement for your anxious child.
The Essence of Supportive Statements
Supportive statements go beyond words of comfort; they empower. By validating your child’s feelings and reinforcing their coping abilities, these statements address both acceptance and confidence. This approach not only helps them to understand and accept their emotions but also encourages steps toward confronting fears.
The Do's of Supportive Statements
- Accept the Feelings and Express Confidence Together:
- “I see you’re really worried about this test, which makes sense given how much you care about doing well and how anxious school tends to make you. You’ve studied hard, and I believe in your ability to tackle this challenge.”
- Consistency in Everyday Life:
- Applying supportive statements regularly reinforces understanding and confidence.
The Don'ts of Supportive Statements
- Avoid dismissing their fears with phrases like “That’s nothing to be scared of.”
- Be wary of reinforcing the notion that they can’t overcome this challenge—your actions and words should convey belief in their resilience, not affirm their anxieties.
Supportive Statements in Action
Tune into your child’s emotions, acknowledge their anxiety or fear, and express belief in their abilities. For a child with social anxiety: “Talking to new kids at school can be daunting, and still I’ve seen you make friends before. I believe in you.” For a child who fears leaving the house: “It’s normal to fear the unknown, and you have the strength to face this.”
Beyond Statements: Building a Supportive Environment
A supportive home environment complements these statements. Model confidence and coping strategies in your own behaviors, and ensure a space where emotions can be openly discussed. Importantly, avoid over-accommodating anxiety-driven behaviors, such as participating in compulsions or facilitating avoidance of feared situations. Encouraging your child to face their fears, with your support, promotes effective coping and resilience, crucial for managing anxiety disorders and OCD.
Fostering Growth and Confidence
Mastering supportive statements can significantly impact your anxious child’s well-being. While simple, these phrases are potent tools in your family’s journey toward managing anxiety. It’s important to recognize that this is just one of many tools you would explore and refine in therapy. We understand that situations are often complex, and therapy at our Center is tailored to your specific circumstances and challenges, providing the support you need to implement these changes effectively.
Stay Connected for More Insights
For more strategies on supporting your anxious child and exploring therapy options, follow us on social media (linked below) and share this guide with anyone who might find it helpful. Visit our blog for other article and our resource page for a curated list of suggested books for parents and families of loved ones with anxiety disorders. If you’re interested in therapies that support parents and families, or directly support anxious kids and young adults, please contact us for personalized guidance. Together, we can navigate this journey toward healing and empowerment.
